By Katie Hoare
Published on May 21st, 2020
Have you ever noticed you’ve done something to physically hurt yourself, but you’ve done it without meaning to? I have. I suffer with dermatillomania, and until recently, I didn’t even know it existed.
Over the years I have done little research into dermatillomania, simply accepting that this was my bad habit, but as similar disorders come to light – such as the hair-pulling condition Trichollitomania – I started to think that maybe there was more to it than a bad habit.
What is dermatillomania?
Closely related to obsessive-compulsive disorder, dermatillomania is characterised by the repetitive and compelling act to pick or rub at one’s skin. Not limited to fingers, it can extend commonly to the face, and often the legs, in my case.
Dermatillomania, skin picking, excoriation disorder… it comes with many names, but for me, it follows one pattern: pick, bleed, shame, anger, pick. Since I can remember, I have picked the skin on my fingers until I’ve caused significant damage. Often, I wouldn’t even realise I was doing it.
It’s not just the soreness that comes with dermatillomania, but the shame, guilt and frustration that has followed me around for years. I get stuck in a cycle of skin picking, for me, this cycle is triggered by worry, stress or anxiety.
Motivational hypnotherapist Nicola Menage explains that dermatillomania is often triggered by a feeling of being out of control, under extreme pressure or stress and can be rooted in childhood experiences or behaviours. She recently saw a client who was struggling with constant skin rubbing, that led to sores and consequently feelings of self-consciousness, anxiety and irritability.
“The condition started when the client was a junior clerk working for a high street bank. He reported how he felt self-conscious that customers were judging his competency whilst still learning the complicated procedures and systems. He would rub so hard that he caused his skin to chaff and create red sores that started to bleed. The frequent rubbing of his skin affected his self-confidence at work and sometimes in social situations when he felt he was put under pressure, or being observed.
